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On Saturday, April 14, 2018 at 2:00 PM EST, after ushering in friends and family, I had the pleasure of watching my best friend get married to a very wonderful woman. It was a delightful and touching experience to be a part of and witness. I couldn’t be more proud and happy for my brother-from-another-mother (and father).
Izzy, short for Israel, and I have been friends for 22 years now. I’ve spent many holidays, birthday parties, and summer cookouts with his family, and through all of life’s experiences, we’ve always picked up right where we left off. As adults, we’re both very busy with our family and professions, so I don’t get to see him as much as I’d like, but that’ll never break our friendship. We will at least reach out to each other to see how the other is doing, and will always remain friends.
When he and his then fiance started planning for their wedding, he dropped the big question on me, “Will you be one of my groomsmen?“. I didn’t hesitate or think twice about it, and said, “Yes, of course. I’d be honored“. And I knew the responsibility it came with, so I prepared for his big event.
As time passed and the date drew closer, we all got suited for our tuxedos, we planned and successfully executed the bachelor party (Good Times), attended and performed the rehearsal, and my wife and I ended up bringing our children since our babysitter never responded to us and seemed to disappear of the face of the Earth (she didn’t really, she works at the daycare our children go to and I saw her yesterday). And in the end, it all worked out. They had a great wedding ceremony for the two newly-weds, the reception was fantastic, we danced, we ate, we drank, we laughed, and some cried tears of joy. Like I said, I couldn’t be more proud and happy for my brother-from-another-mother (and father).
That’s the short and sweet version of it all. But there are a couple things I want to point out to you because they stood out to me.
During the ceremony, the priest said something very moving. He talked about how he enjoys going up to Maine to visit the coast with all the rocky cliffs and lighthouses. He talked about how he enjoyed the smell of the ocean and the sounds of the waves as they crash onto the rocks. As he spoke, he shifted the focus of his speech onto the smaller rocks that tumble around as the water rushes in and out. He said the rocks reminded him of people.
“You see, these rocks were smooth, very smooth, as some people are in character.” he said. These kinds of people, they’re calm, collected, hold their composure very well, and look like they’ve got it all together. But these rocks were once jagged and rough around the edges, as most rocks are in nature. He went on to say that the waves of the ocean are like the events in our lives. They come and go and throw us around quite a bit, banging and rubbing us up against one and other. And it’s because of these experiences that we evolve, and we begin to smooth out our rough edges. It was at that point he stepped down to Izzy and his (almost) wife, and handed them two smooth stones. He said that he picked the two rocks up off of the coast of Maine and brought them there that day because they represented the two of them. So, as they began their life together as husband and wife, they would continue to smooth away their rough edges, only now they would do it together. He soon pronounced them husband and wife, and we all cheered.
That resonated with me in a positive way. It made me think of the all of the growth I’ve gone through with my wife. That made me very happy for Izzy to be marrying the woman he loves and now calls “Wife”.
The second piece that hit home for me was Izzy’s brother and his Best Man’s Speech. It was as hilarious as it was touching (watch the clip). The touching part was when Izzy’s brother explained the meaning behind the ring finger. He had the maid of honor assist and put her hands and fingers together, as shown in the picture below.
He then went on to explained that your thumb represents your parents, your index finger represents your siblings, your middle finger represents yourself, the little finger represents your children, and your ring finger represents your life partner.
He told her to tuck her middle fingers down (as shown in the photo). This is you as yourself.
He then said that we all love our parents, we learn from them, but one day we part ways with them, and he had the maid of honor separate her thumbs. If you do this with your hands and fingers, you’ll see you can open your two thumbs up and away from each other.
Next, he said that we are close with our siblings, we’ll always be in touch with them, but we will also separate from our siblings at some point. You’ll be able to open your two index fingers away from each other if you try.
He said that we love our children very much, we’ll always watch over them, protect them, and give them a home if they need one, but we will part ways with our children one day when they grow up. You can see that you can open up with two little fingers.
He paused for a second, and then he said that the ring fingers do not separate, and he had the maid of honor try, as well as everyone else doing this. He went on to tell his brother that these two fingers represent him and his new wife. He said that the ring fingers are inseparable, as two people are in marriage. He told his brother that marriage is a union that bonds two people forever, and that the commitment that comes with it should be forever honored.
As I sat at my table with our daughter in my lap, arms wrapped around her, getting hand cramps trying to separate my two ring fingers, I turned and smiled at my wife who was smiling right back at me with our son in her lap. My son was smiling too because he was playing with his fingers at this point.
That day and evening was full of love, grace, and gratitude. It was a beautiful wedding for a beautiful couple. Izzy, if you’re reading this, congratulations again and I’m so happy for you. You deserve it brother!
If you’re married, with a special someone, have children, still have your parents around, have siblings, or even some very close friends… Remember this, our relationships in life must be cherished. We are here for such a short time and this life can be so beautiful if we let it. Take moments to appreciate your loved ones, and surround yourself with positive people that you’ll share lifetime relationships with.
Make sure you follow Izzy’s Instagram –> @iz_the_barb3r
and visit him at the shop if you’re need of a haircut in the Dracut, MA area.
Tell him Clinton sent you.
Five Stars Barbershop
16 Pleasant St, Dracut, MA 01826
Five Stars Babershop Facebook Page
As always, thank you again for reading.
Check out my site for more information on IamClintFit
and feel free to reach out via my contact form for any questions or topics you want me to talk about in my next post.